Oh, I am so glad for this blog! I am so glad that I have a place to vent without judgement! I have to be careful what I say on Facebook. And sometimes I can't even pick up the phone to call someone to talk because it is just too hard. I know you know what I mean if you deal with this kind of heartache every day. You just don't want to talk about it because there is too much to say.
The concussion doc cleared her for gradual return to play. Yes, praise God! But I couldn't even rejoice over this yesterday because I have been holding my breath for so long that I still can barely breathe. I just felt numb. I think the only close analogy is if your child is suffering from a life threatening illness (which she is actually) and a doctor comes in and says that their blood count looks good, for now. A little dramatic, but when you have a child who suffers every day, and has so little that is positive in their lives, and that one thing might be taken away, you as a parent cling to that hope as well. Could it be an idol, something that has too tight of a grip on us? Yes, I know that it could. Life is more than a sport, I agree wholeheartedly. Far more. But I have a sick child. With no friends. And major academic struggles. She needs this.
The IEP head, again the most amazing gem in the world, has told Caroline's teachers to not count her missing assignments as part of her grades right now, so that her ability to qualify to play lacrosse isn't jeopardized. Yes, she is an angel. God has put her in our lives. Just want to cry.
We will try to put Caroline back in school next week for just an hour or so at a time, to see if these glasses counteract the fluorescent light sensitivity I know I said we were leaning toward just homeschooling her, but we decided that we need to give it one last try. She needs to be able to deal with fluorescent light at some point because life is full of it everywhere.
Thank you for praying. I felt it.
About our Daughter
I am mother to four wonderful daughters, ages 17, 19, 21, and 23, and wife to the greatest husband on earth. God has given us a special child to raise one who was diagnosed with early-onset bipolar disorder at the age of seven, though she showed signs of it from the age of fifteen months. She also has ADHD, Sensory Integration Disorder (sensory seeking), Dyslexia, and Non-Verbal Learning Disorder-NOS, all typical comorbidities for a bipolar child. In spite of the trials, she enjoys lacrosse, running (finished her first marathon in October of 2014!), and reading and writing her own books. I will share with you the many joys and sorrows we have faced and will face in the future with the hope that you may find better understanding about this mental illness caused by both chemical and structural abnormalities in the brain. I desire that you will be encouraged by this blog if you are also dealing with a bipolar child. Thank you for reading and sharing in our journey.
How Did You Know She Was Bipolar So Young?
I wrote a long explanation of how we came to this bipolar diagnosis in a child so young under my post of March 19th of 2009. If your child or a child you know bears similarities, please seek out a good psychiatrist and don't wait for "things to get better." Often they will simply get worse, and the longer a child is unmedicated, the more damage their brain can accrue. Early diagnoses and treatment are key to providing these children with a chance at a successful life later as a teen and an adult.