Medications Aren't the Panacea

Some of you may be thinking that we are awfully quick to medicate our kids, as if we have a knee-jerk reaction when any one of them is acting out: they are misbehaving, so they must need a medication to keep them in line. Let me reassure you that we do not believe that the first answer to any behavioral problem is medication. Consistent discipline, loving rebuke, and lots of boundaries are the foundation for solid parenting. To throw a drug at a child but not address their behavioral and heart issues adds up to poor parenting. But if a child meets the criteria for a mood disorder, or an attention-deficit disorder, then to not provide that child with the right medication so their brain can do what it is supposed to be doing is but can't because it is lacking in certain brain chemicals, is in my mind, a type of child abuse. Unmedicated kids with ADHD, bipolar disorder, Asperger's often come to be viewed as the trouble makers at school and at home, their relationships marred by behavior which is neurological and chemical in origin. A child who is constantly receiving rebuke at home and in the classroom because they can't focus, can't sit still, can't act with appropriate manners in different situations, will soon be a discouraged, defeated child who decides early on he or she can't succeed in anything, and will have few friends, and fewer opportunities to excel in life.

I do highly tout the use of natural brain-boosters like the Omega 3s and 6s found in fish and flax oils, and exploring vitamin deficiencies, protein deficiencies, and the like, because we are organic beings who are greatly affected by what goes into our bodies. And good psychological counseling is a MUST for any family dealing with a severely challenging child because the strain of caring for them can be overwhelming, and the child also needs to be able to work on his attitudes and behaviors in a safe environment. Great parenting gurus are out there with wonderful books offering sound advice for correcting negative attitudes and behaviors--I couldn't list them all. We have certainly read many of them ourselves, and taken many parenting classes, some good, some not so good.

But as much as some would like to think that strong-willed kids just needs more discipline from likely over-permissive parents, I would ask you to withhold judgement if you do not walk in our shoes. And if you have a child with whom you are struggling beyond the norm, please do not refuse to consider medication because so many kids are "over-diagnosed" and "over-medicated." Think about the fact that many children have diabetes and you would not withhold medications from a child whose pancreas wasn't functioning --that would be abuse outright. You are not doing your child any favors by withholding what may a huge part of the answer to his problems. Read up on neurology and how the different areas of the brain interact and control many of our emotions and behaviors, and how abnormalities in certain areas affect outward behavior. We can control many of our decisions and actions, but there are reactions and states of mind that are outside of our control if our brains aren't functioning properly. Sometimes you have to undergo a lot trial and error with medications (we have done years of this), but if you love your child, you won't stop trying until you have found what works so he or she can fulfill their God-given potential.

We live in a fallen world, and this means that we are frail humans living in a messed up world, with often messed up bodies and minds. The good news is that we have the gift of wonderful medicines and doctors that humans for centuries past have not had the privilege of using, so be thankful, and do what is best for your child!

I'll get off my soap box now.