I stopped blogging, but here is why...

Many have reached out and wondered why I stopped blogging.  The truth is she is doing SO WELL! At 21, she is attending community college, applying to Physical Therapy Assistant School, and running marathons.  She makes her own psychotherapy and psychiatry appointments, refills her meds on her own, takes them regularly and self-monitors like a champ.  She lives at home but will likely move into her own apartment this summer.  She started her own dog sitting business and works part-time at an optometrist office and even does the initial patient exams.  We NEVER thought she would ever be able to do these things.  The key to her success is that she went to Meridell Achievement Center years ago where they got her on the right med mix (still 7 different meds!) and has always gone to counseling faithfully.  And the biggest thanks goes to God who has been the One she still credits with her turnaround when she was 13 and went to five months in the best residential treatment facility we could find.

My advice:  NEVER give up finding the best providers for your child.  DON'T rely on the public school alone to give your child what they need.  You need the SUPPORT systems for the whole family that you need to FIND and KEEP, whether online through the parent groujps on the  Depression and Bipolar Support Alliance www.dbsalliance.org or in the nearest city if it has better providers.  We drove an hour and a half away for a time to get our daughter what she needed.  Take care of your own needs and those of the siblings who should all be counseling as well.  PRAY hard and ask for help.   Also don't be AFRAID to medicate.  Really.  I'll say it again.  DON'T BE AFRAID TO MEDICATE.  Medications have SAVED her life.  She was not functional before we found the right mix and yes it is A LOT.  Some kids have severe bipolar disorder.  Don't think that the just-do-essential-oil-and-all-natural-remedies approach is going to work for MOST bipolar kids.  I'm shooting straight here because I get so tired of parents telling me that their kid is a mess and they don't want to medicate.  Really?  So you would rather they suffer?  And not have a life?  Get over it!!! Loving your child isn't hoping for the best while denying them what they need.

God is good.  Trust Him, take care of yourself, and never give up.  Intervene early.  Stay connected even if it is just online.

Blessings, Megan

She graduated from High School!!!!

The day arrived and she did it!  She walked across that stage and took her hard-earned diploma today.  Praise God!  There were many times we weren't sure how she would finish high school, but she kept plugging along, and with the help of fabulous teachers, psychologists, psychiatrists, mentors, and God himself,  she reached her goal.  We are so proud of her!   Time to celebrate!

Meridell and How Do You Know it is Time to Seek Residential Treatment?

I get this question a lot, and I thought I would just answer it right here.   If your child has been hospitalized several times without good effect, if the right med mix seemingly can't be found outpatient, if they are a consistent danger to themselves or you or their siblings, if they have given up hope that they can ever be anything but a failure in relationships, in school and at home, don't hesitate to consider residential treatment.  This is a last resort, but it shouldn't be out of the question.  To do nothing but what you have been doing without good lasting results is foolish.

That being said, do your homework.  There are great residential centers and some poor ones.  The poor ones would be worse than not going.  Find the best you can afford.  We choose Meridell because of its reputation.  We didn't live anywhere near Texas, but it was worth it.    I would take out a second mortgage if I had to.  The experience changed our daughter's life for the good, and she is still grateful she went.  

I think the key test is if the stress level is so great at home that everyone's mental health is seriously affected, you need to look at residential, to give your child real hope and to give yourself a much needed break.

Needs a Job after Graduation

So the summer is almost upon us and high school is almost done, forever!  Caroline needs a job and so if you are a praying person, pray that just the right one will come her way, preferably sports-related.  Just found out the district will most likely pay for her final year of enrollment at the technical college to become a personal trainer for next year.  Unbelievable!  Our school district rocks!!  On another note, I am beginning classes to become a real estate broker.  I had been looking a various career options now that she is stable and nearly out of school and after a lot of prayer and thought, I am embarking on this new phase of life.  Freedom!  Excited and scared to death at the same time.  I haven't been able to work outside of the home for any significant amount of time since she was diagnosed twelve years ago.  But being at home with her was important and worth it.  Not sure she would be where she is without the constant presence I was able to provide.  Many parents out there aren't so fortunate, I know.

Trying Gluten Free for Migraines

With a big uptick in daily migraines, we are looking for every possible cause.  On her own, she decided to try going gluten free for a while to see if this will make a difference.  I had to eliminate gluten and dairy two years ago and found that my digestive issues miraculously disappeared, but not the migraines.  Mine are definitely weather related.  Hers seems to be weather and who knows what.  We watched her get a sudden migraine right after finishing her birthday dinner at a restaurant on Saturday, so the food connection seems plausible.  Might be time to get a complete sensitivity test done.

Headaches and Scrolling Vision

There has been an unfortunate increase in these episodes of headaches and scrolling vision.  She is tearful and frustrated because of how much they have been interfering with her school life recently.  She was diagnosed with hypothyroidism a few months ago and we have had to make some adjustments after the addition of the synthroid.   We first had to increase the Lamictal by 25 mgs for some mania but this may have precipitated the headaches. So we go back to the doc as soon as possible so we can come up with a solution.  Maybe we need to get her into a neurologist.  

Lacrosse Replaced by Marathon Training

So Caroline has hung up her lacrosse sticks for good after a disappointing experience on her high school team the last two seasons.  Basically, the coach wouldn't play her during the games more than a few minutes.  This is the girl that has been pursued by college recruiters.  I think it was discriminatory based on her bipolar diagnosis and on her previous concussions her freshman year.  She did play last summer on a travel team, and was always a starter and got lots of play time, so the issue was definitely with this coach.

The good news is Caroline loves to run and started training for her first marathon last summer, and finished the Denver Rock N' Roll in October.  Now she is training for her next marathon in Utah.  Yes, this child of mine is remarkable considering the myriad of obstacles she has had to overcome since she was first diagnosed at the age of seven.  She turns nineteen this week.  We can hardly believe she is on her way to adulthood.  When we think of the many years of complete despair and difficulty, this is a miracle indeed.  Gratefulness overwhelms us.

Another positive development has been her relationship with her oldest sister.  Caroline has longed for reconciliation and wrote a letter to her last fall asking for forgiveness for the many events that unfolded while she was unstable.  Elizabeth, much to our surprise, embraced her sister's conciliatory note wholeheartedly, even getting a tattoo on her foot in Hannah's bold signature (not so excited about tattoos but nonetheless we are delighted.)

God is good.