And it's about time, at 43, that I embrace the discipline of relaxing. Yes, discipline, because for most of us the tendency to freak out, stress out, hold our breath, pull our hair out, is the natural inclination rather than taking a deep breath, viewing the crisis in perspective, unwrinkling our brows, relaxing our shoulders, and in general simply refusing to allow someone else's mess to determine our own emotional state. Easier said than done, but I am tired of being stressed out over what others think of me, my house, my clothes, my kids, my husband, my math skills (no cash register at work!), my homework-helper skills, and so on. Life is too short to take on someone else's opinions, worries, bitterness, and anger. Why do I say no to my own needs and yes to everyone else's wants? Why do I make excuses for not doing the important because the trivial gets in the way?
We all have our flaws and our struggles, but if we lived our lives with the perspective that people are more important than stuff, schedules, money, and careers, than we would all slow down and have far more quality in our lives. I am all for it.
Megan- I so agree with this- we spend way too much energy focused on others opinions of our lives. I say "walk in my shoes" and then see why I make the choices I do. We can only do our best each day- who cares if the dust bunnies build up or my hair has not been highlighted in 6 months? I love my kids and my husband and choose to make them my priority- but try to remember that you also must be a priority- I was lamenting to my husband that I was a "bad mom" for some very benign comment I made and his comment was - "self preservation is not being a bad mom" Words of wisdom for sure- sometimes self preservation means focusing in on the really important things- who cares what anyone else thinks about all the other stuff...
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