A blog for anyone who needs to know they are not alone in raising a bipolar child.
Wednesday, March 11, 2009
Not My Favorite Day (week?)
What can I say. Another crazy day. More doctor appointments, some planned, some not. I just really kind of had it today. Honestly, I'm just sick of being a caregiver 24/7. I wanted to just get in the car and drive away and just get away, from everything and everyone. Having Caroline in our family is like having someone walking around every day with a gaping, oozing wound, ugly and putrescent, something you shrink from lookng at, but you have to look at it everyday knowing you are powerless to cure this constantly bleeding gash. I lost it at her today when she declared she was not going to lacrosse practice. We have spent so much money on her, and often she will quit before she has really started out of fear of failure. I felt awful later for blasting her, because I know she woud be completely different if it wasn't for this uncaring disorder. I really was overcome by anger this afternoon and just kind of drove around until I ended up at a friend's house for a glass of wine and girl-time. She was so great, just letting me vent. She doesn't completely understand, but she is there for me, and I am so grateful.
When I first started reading this entry I thought you needed some girl time. Glad you got it! If you ever find yourself in my neck of the woods, you can certainly have some girl time with me!
ReplyDeleteBTW I blasted my kids the other night too - and they don't have the difficulty of being bipolar either. I'd just gotten pee'd on after A had wet his pants 3 other times in one day! AND the waiter didn't bring the check in a timely manner so we could leave the CG dinner early so as to not have even HAD this situation!
Come to think of it, we would've need a BOTTLE of wine between us instead of just a glass :-)